Honeymoon With Jesus.

My perspective has changed

quite a bit since the first few weeks

of being in Ghana.

Now,

when I close my eyes,

I vividly see the faces of

several smiling African

Deaf children,

each with their own little giggle,

their own way of greeting me,

or walking me to my classroom.

They are eager.

They are excited.

They are welcoming.

And they are thankful.

As the Signs of Hope International

Summer group of 2012 finishes up

our last couple of weeks here

on the mission field,

I can't help but look back

at how my perspective has changed

about so many things.

When I get back to the states,

I will appreciate everything I have.

My loving parents.

My amazing family.

My encouraging boyfriend.

My wonderful friends.

My supportive church family.

Consistently running water.

Soft toilet paper.

Brushing my teeth with water from the tap.

Drinking out of cups rather than bagged water.

Warm showers.

Education.

My job.

My car.

My clean city.

A bed without wooden bars.

Sheets that don't feel damp.

Going to bed without having to use bug spray.

I could go on.

I will maybe have a shorter temper

with people who reside in a "first-world mindset."

I may get completely fed up

with American culture and the way

we do things.

There are so many things I will miss

about this country.

Ghanaian culture is so very different

than what I've been raised in.

People come before possessions,

agendas, or duties.

They work hard for their food. 

They conserve.

They plan ahead.

They fix what is broken,

rather than buying something new.

They invest in each other's lives

and their relationships.

They happily direct you if your lost,

and sometimes even walk a mile or

two just to make sure you made it safely.

They genuinely care.

I'll miss the little children

calling from their houses

as we walk down the street,

"Obruni, obruni!"

Just so we can turn around

to see them waving so happily.

My mind often fights focusing on going home,

dreaming of all the things I wish to do.

But I must not wish my time here away.

I must be present.

In the classroom.

In my group.

In my relationship with Jesus.

I recently flipped back entries

in my journal to the very beginning

of my journey, to May 7th, 2012,

before I even left for Africa.

When I read what God was teaching

me that day,

I realized He has been sending

me the same message throughout my

entire journey.

May 7th 2012.

"If you learn to trust Me - really trust Me - with your whole being, then nothing can separate you from My Peace.  "Everything you endure can be put to good use by allowing it to train you in trusting Me.  This is how you foil the works of evil, by growing in grace through the very adversity that was meant to harm you.  Do not fear what this day, or any day may bring your way.  Concentrate on trusting Me and on doing what needs to be done.  Relax in My sovereignty, remembering I go before you.  Fear NO evil."

I began reading through each entry carefully,

starting from May 7th and going up to my current entry.

I highlighted what God had said to me each day,

what He was revealing to me about myself,

and reminders about the mission He called me to.

My journal was a mess.

But I knew it made perfect sense in His eyes.

So I took all of God's words He had spoken 

to me and through me ever since before my

journey started and this is the result.

THIS IS THE PURPOSE OF MY GHANA, WEST AFRICA TRIP.

I was so focused on learning,

discovering and exploring,

that I missed the sole purpose of my trip,

was to allow my Jesus just to love on me.

To show me who I am in Him.

Who He created me to be.

He desires just to sit in the stillness

of the moment and sing to me.

This is what I believe 100% God has been speaking to me

by compiling my journal entries into

one simple thought:

"My child,

Trust me.

Be still.

Be still.

Be still.

Let ME be God.

My plans for you are GOOD.

I LOVE YOU.

My perfect Love drives out fear.

If you choose to trust this,

you can rest and enjoy the present moment."

Since this discovery,

I've focused on just "being."

Being and living in the moment.

Not having an agenda

for spending time with God,

but just literally BEING with Him.

I've focused on being present in the classroom.

BEING there for the children,

not primarily focused on educating.

Not focused on making them understand,

or trying to improve their performance

in the classroom.

I've began focusing on loving them.

Just being there with them because

they enjoy my company.

And I enjoy theirs.

Maybe this is what God intended all along.

My discovery of the need to just be present

in the classroom,

focused on loving, caring, and being there 

for the beautiful children of Ghana, West Africa,

is a direct reflection on what God desired

to do for me upon arriving here.

He wasn't focused on educating,

or making me understand His will,

or even trying to improve my performance

in this world.

But focused on simply loving on me.

Caring for my every need,

and being there with me because

HE enjoys MY company.

And He is teaching me to enjoy

His more and more everyday.

Man,

I thought "Be Fearless"

meant I was going to come to Ghana,

and feel like David against Goliath.

But, turns out,

God sent me to a country

full of people who have more faith

then I do.

Christ's name is proclaimed on the backs

of taxis, tro tros, and about 95% of every

business name has the word Grace,

Mercy, Love, Peace, 

the beautiful name of Jesus,

or a Bible verse.

God exists everywhere.

But His name is shouted from the 

mountain tops here in Ghana.

Turns out,

God brought me here,

to reveal His overwhelming

love He has for me.

God called me here to love on me.

I can't believe how much He loves me.

I can't believe HOW much He loves us.

I've gained more of an appreciation

for the people in my life,

than I have the capacity to hold

in my heart.

I am joyful.

I am blessed.

I am beyond thankful.

Divine Discoveries.

Recently God has revealed to me

how the puzzle pieces of my passions

fit together in His will for my life.

\\::PASSIONS:://

I've always loved photography.

The idea of seeing something,

in a way no one else can,

and capturing it in its very essence

is something so captivating,

so alluring, and

so mysterious to me.

I am a writer.

God has given me the ability

to take an idea,

whether complex or simple,

and create a metaphor

to better understand the concept.

From the day I was born,

I've grown up around music.

My parents, brothers, sister,

aunts, uncles, cousins,

and myself all indulge in music.

It's our way of expressing

some of our innermost feelings,

whether by writing songs,

singing songs, or

following a simple melody 

on a musical instrument.

Before,

when thinking of all of my passions,

I wondered why and how I liked

so many things so deeply,

and how they honestly all fit

together in one puzzle.

I didn't know I'd find the answer

half way around the world

in a little country the size of Oregon

called Ghana, West Africa.

My passionate ability to see something

and photograph it, 

capturing its beauty,

its essence,

gives glory to God in the sense

that I am capturing an element

of His creation and sharing an image

that is timeless.

Just as God is timeless.

My passionate ability to take an idea

and metaphorically explain it

in a different way by paralleling

two completely, possibly random subjects,

has shown to be a way that I actually

explain the essence of God to myself

as well as others.

Whether it's comparing red balloons

to the love of Jesus,

or the smiles of African Deaf children

to the beauty of our Heavenly Father.

Music.

Oh, music.

This is how God communicate directly with me.

I never knew that something

so incredibly dear to my family,

connecting us in a way unlike any other,

would be the exact outlet God would use

in order for me to commune with Him.

I've realized that there really is no other place

I'd rather be than with my arms stretched

out wide, towards the Heavenly place

where my Abba resides,

singing songs of praise, hurt,

joy, and of longing for Him.

And in return, 

He has begun teaching me

some things about His character

through the words of other people

who have created songs,

inspired by the Spirit of God Himself.

The passions He's given me,

whether I acknowledge it or not,

always point back to Him.

My first couple of weeks in Ghana,

God was teaching me to just Be Still.

Be Still and KNOW that HE IS GOD.

Beyond that,

to actually LET Him BE God.

And to STOP trying to BE God in my own life.

In other words,

to STOP trying to make things happen

on my own time,

in my own way,

and somehow make it seem

God-orchestrated when really

it may not be.

And so I was still.


\\::CHILD-LIKE FAITH:://

In order to past some time,

I borrowed a book from one of the girls

here called, The Shack.

I thought it would be a good thing

to do some reading while here,

and what better than the Shack?

If you don't know this book,

it's about a man who goes back

to the shack where his little girl

was murdered

and he meets God!

God is revealed to him in three

different people.

One representing the Father,

the Son,

and the Holy Spirit.

Upon reading this book,

each member of the Trinity is

displayed as completely Biblical

AND metaphorical (my favorite!)

How did God know? :]

Upon reading the book this week,

I stumbled upon this passage:

[God is responding to the main character who is asking about pain and suffering in the world]

"You really don't understand yet.  You try to make sense of the world in which you live based on a very small and incomplete picture of reality.  It is like looking at a parade through the tiny knothole of hurt, pain, self-centeredness, and power and believing you are on your own and insignificant.  All of these thoughts contain powerful lies.  You see pain and death as ultimate evils and God as the ultimate betrayer, or perhaps, at best, as fundamentally untrustworthy.  You dictate the terms and judge my actions and find me guilty.

The real underlying flaw in your life is that you don't think I am good.  If you knew I was good and that everything-the means, the ends, and all the processes of individual lives- is all covered by my goodness, then while you might not always understand what I am doing, you would trust me.  But you don't.

You cannot produce trust, just as you cannot "do" humility.  It either is or is not.  Trust is the fruit of a relationship in which you know you are loved.  Because you do not know that I love you, you cannot trust me."

And there is was.

God showed up.

And spoke to me through a book.

He said,

"Ali, I Am good.

and I love you.

If you choose to believe these two simple things,

you would trust Me."

That was it.

It was time to stop just being still

and allowing Him to be God,

it was also time to start believing

that God is who He says He is.

It was time to stop thinking SO much,

and just sit back with the child-like

faith He calls us to in the first place.

1. God is good.

2. God is love.

3. There is nothing else left to do that make sense but to trust Him.

I realize this is something God revealed

to me a couple of weeks ago.

I know I even blogged about it, too.

1. God's plan for my life is good (Jer. 29:11)

2. This highlights God's love for me.

3. God's perfect love drives out fear, therefore I can trust Him. (1 John 4:18)

Things are paralleling.

It's amazing how I forget.

Then, this morning,

I listened to three different songs.

Each of which God revealed to me

this simple idea, again.

Through our new passageway of communication:

MUSIC.

First, Jon Foreman's "House Of God Forever."

My amazingly encouraging

boyfriend asked me to listen to this song

in a bit of a different way.

Completely relaxed,
still,
quiet,

and BELIEVING that God was present,

breathing life and spirit into me.

In this song it sings directly from Psalm 23

(The verse I asked my mom to continuously

read to my grandma before she died a few weeks ago

so it is already incredibly dear to my heart.)

"The Shepherd's staff comforts me

You are my feast in the presence of enemies

surely goodness will follow me"

GOODNESS!

1. God is good.

PERIOD.

Then, Jon Foreman's "Your Love is Strong"

was the next worship song I let my body sag into.

It sang, 

"So why should I worry

why do I freak out

God knows what I need 

You know what I need.

Your love is

Your love is

Your love is strong

There's two things You told me

that You are strong

and You love me

yes You love me!

Your love is

Your love is

Your love is STRONG."

1. God is good.

2. God loves me.

And the third song,

Elevation Worship's, "Give Me Faith."

"Give me faith

to TRUST what You say

that You're GOOD

and You're LOVE is great.

I'm broken inside,

I give You my life."

I lost it.

So there it was.

1. God is GOOD.

2. God loves me.

3. Therefore, Trust God.

How can I NOT do this now?

It's so clear,

it's calling my name.

It's time to have that child-like

faith God called me to in the first place.

Life just gets so in the way.

When really,

we just make it so much harder on ourselves.

If we truly focused the energy 

we use to focus on other things

like work, bills, finances, school,

kids, relationships, fear, doubt, guilt,

the list goes on…

If we focused THAT energy

on the Biblical based scriptures that

say

1. God is GOOD

2. God LOVES you

then, we would have no other reason than to trust Him.

They're such simple words,

but when the incredible extent of their meaning

is revealed to us,

its simplicity, yet all encompassing

greatness and power, it becomes

everything we need to focus on,

soaking up its outcome of 

PEACE.

THANKFULNESS

and JOY!


//::A TIME TO FIGHT::\\

A couple of days ago,

recovering from my second 

illness while here in Ghana,

I was restless,

stomach pains,

cold sweat,

on the verge of tears,

when the verse 

"greater is He who is in you, than

he who is in the world."

(1 John 4:4)

popped into my head out of nowhere.

This isn't a verse I've meditated on,

well, really ever.

It is a verse that my mom constantly

has told me since being here in Africa,

but I couldn't really figure out how it 

applied right in that moment.

But the verse didn't stop.

It was like an involuntary voice

in my head.

I'd forget about it,

then my mind would hear it again.

It was persistent.

Last night it hit me.

The incredible amount of energy

Satan is putting into trying to

corrupt my mission.

Illness, discouragement,

loneliness, isolation, fear,

doubt, guilt, worry.

These are all things I've struggled 

with while here, even starting

from the VERY first night!!

I've also heard from a few friends

back home that they are feeling these

exact same troubles.

Satan is at work in more than just Africa.

He's trying his hardest 

to corrupt any mission leading to God.

It's time.

My body is now healed

and I'm ready to fight back.

I'm ready to put on the belt of truth,

the breastplate of righteousness,

the helmet of salvation,

pick up the sword of the spirit

and the shield of faith,

then walk with my feet into

the path of piece,

fully armored with God,

ready to fight back for HIS will

and not submit to the will

of the evil one,

because I feel "weak."

"I may be weak,

but YOUR spirit is strong in me.

My flesh may fail,

but My God, you never will."

Also, "greater is HE who is in me,

than he who is in the world."

Dear Prayer Warriors.

Philippians Chapter 1.

Dear Army Back Home,

Each time I think about my 

prayer warriors back in the States,

interceding, defending, and fighting

for my mission for Christ in Ghana,

West Africa;

I am overwhelmingly grateful

and I thank God.

(Philippians 1:3)

There is great joy in my heart because

of your unending faithfulness

and ongoing encouragement to me

from the very first moment

my mission started

to even the moment I write this letter.

I am confident you will be blessed

because of your giving hearts

and generous prayers.

(Philippians 1:4-6)

My overwhelming joy

remains the same whether

I am in chains, suffering for Christ,

through homesickness,

loneliness, feelings of isolation,

and fear,

or I am defending and confirming the gospel,

through counsel with a team member,

or using my hands to teach Deaf African

children about Jesus.

May you all share in God's grace with me.

(Philippians 1:7-8)

And this is my prayer:

that your love may abound more

and more in knowledge and depth

of insight, so that you may be able

to discern what is best and may be pure

and blameless until the day of Christ,

filled with the fruit of righteousness

that comes through Jesus Christ-

to the glory and praise of God.

(Philippians 1: 9-11)

What I am and have been experiencing

in this third-world country, 

I am confident is being used

to advance the gospel.

It is obvious to me and many

of my warriors back home that I am

in chains for Christ.

But because of my chains,

I pray and hope that most of

my friends in the Lord have been

encouraged to speak the word of God

more courageously and fearlessly.

This would give me peace and hope

that my mission, through the power

of the Spirit of Jesus Christ, is extending

beyond predicted borders,

and overflowing into the hearts of lost souls.

(Philippians 1:12-14)

I continue to rejoice,

for I know that through your prayers

and the help given by the Spirit

of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me

will turn out for my deliverance.

I eagerly expect and hope

that I will in no way be ashamed, 

but will have sufficient courage so that now

as always Christ will be exalted in my body,

whether by life or by death.

(Philippians 1:19-20)

For to me, to live is Christ,

and to die is gain.

(Philippians 1:21)

Do not worry, friends,

when I speak of dying for Christ,

it is evident to me the necessity 

that I remain in the body.

My purpose on Earth is not complete.

Convinced of this,

I know that I will remain,

and I will continue to rejoice with you

in your progress and joy in the faith.

(Philippians 1:24-26)

In return for your consistent prayers,

I encourage you;

BE FEARLESS.

Suffer for Christ

and rejoice because of it.

(Philippians 1:28-30)

If you suffer as a Christian,

do not be ashamed, but praise God

that you bear that name.

(1 Peter 3:16)

BE FEARLESS.

For it is God who works

in you to will and to act

according to His good purpose.

(Philippians 2:13)

LOVEfromGHANA,

Ali

~Inspired by Paul.